4.16.2007

The Superwoman Problem

I'm writing instead of balancing my checkbook. This also means I'm writing instead of shopping, because before I gave myself liberty to shop, I decided I wanted to balance my checkbook to make sure the items I thought might actually bring me some satisfaction wouldn't come with a financial-stress surcharge.

I can sense that lately, I have been in "superwoman" mode: I've been so busy worrying about keeping other people happy that I sorta haven't been doing anything nice for myself. I keep thinking I should schedule a massage, or buy some new shoes, or...actually, those are the only two things I can think of. So tonight, I quite purposefully started to shop. Then I stopped myself and decided I needed to figure out how much money I had to spend. Then I stopped myself further because I thought I should do fun tasks (writing in my blog) before unfun ones (accounting, even though I do find that somewhat relaxing as I think I've noted here before). Then I happened to remember that I have been trying to consume less in general, because I take way too much stuff to the Salvation Army already. And before I knew it, I wasn't shopping anymore, and I also wasn't doing anything nice for myself anymore (unless allowing oneself to blog is doing something nice for oneself, but god I hope it hasn't come to that).

So now, I am going to balance my checkbook, but only until it stops being relaxing, and then I'm going to schedule a massage, even if I don't know whether I have enough money. And instead of using the tagline that comes to mind, because I'm one crazy overanalytical superwoman, I'd like thank the copy writer who came up with the Loreal ad campaign "because you're worth it." You are brilliant.

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