1.20.2006

Ring... Ring... Ring... Ring...

Hey, all cell phone companies out there! It's time to extend the four-rings-then-voicemail standard. That standard is totally out of date. It's based on the days when you had one or two phones in your home. These phones didn't move much. When it started ringing, you knew where it was. You walked straight to it. You got there within four rings. If you didn't answer, it was because you didn't want to.

Now, everyone has both a cell phone and a cordless phone at home. These phones move around. Your cell phone, in particular, moves around a lot. Sometimes, it moves around of its own volition, sliding down to the bottom of your bag or into that weird nether region under the seat of your car. Sometimes, it gets moved by someone who doesn't own it. Most importantly, it's never in the place you expect it to be. When it rings the first time, you're lucky if you know which general direction to move in. The second time it rings, you confirm your course and start to find its general region. On the third ring, you're digging, but by then, hope starts to fade. You've got to work fast--you're on the fourth ring! You see the light--you grasp!

Missed call.

Four rings just doesn't cut it anymore.

2 comments:

Mary Tsao said...

This happens to me every time!

Jonathan Blackman said...

Ring, ring.

"Hello," "there is a collect call from Mr. Floyd to Mrs. Floyd will you accept the charges?"

"I don't understand who is answering?" "It was a man's voice and he hung up".

"Every day love turns gray like the skin on a diying mands hand."